Introduction: The Unsayable Ecstasies -- Letter to a Young Writer --There Are No Rules -- Your First Line -- Don't Write What You Know -- The Terror of the White Page -- No Ideas Without Music -- A Hero of Consciousness -- Out from the Dust: Creating Characters -- Shaping the Truth -- Carry a Notebook -- Be a Camera -- Fuhgheddaboudit: Writing Dialogue -- Read Aloud -- Who What Where When How and Why -- Seeking Structure -- What Matters: Language and Plot -- Punctuation: It's Not Just a Throwaway Thing (Comma) -- Research: Google Isn't Deep Enough -- No Rust on Your Sentences Please -- The Habit of Hoping -- There are No Literary Olympics -- How Old is the Young Writer? -- Don't Be a Dick -- Then Again, Don't Be Too Nice -- Fail, Fail, Fail -- Read, Read, Read -- Rejoyce -- Writing is Entertainment -- Take a Break -- Who's Your Ideal Reader? -- How to Get an Agent -- What if I Don't Get an Agent? -- Finding the Right Editor -- Bringing (Your Own) Fresh Eyes to Your Stories -- Throw It All Away -- Allow the Reader's Intelligence -- Success -- If You're Done, You've Only Just Begun -- Blurbs (or the Art of Literary Porn) -- A Secret Hearing -- Where Should I Write? -- To MFA or Not to MFA? -- Should I Read While I'm Writing? -- Smash that Mirror -- The Dark Dogs of the Mind -- Write Yourself a Credo -- The Bus Theory -- Why Tell Stories -- Embrace the Critics -- Be Exhausted When You Finish -- Your Last Line -- Letter to a Young Writer, Redux.